no will power

Yea, I didn't stay in the city for the weekend. I didn't think I would. When it comes to that boy, I have no will-power. And I'm going again on Friday for the weekend. I can't help it.

don't try to make sense of this

This is going to be as broad as possible...

I feel like the worst girlfriend in the world. 8 days without, and then on the weekend I ruined that progress. And now it's been pretty much everyday since then. And I'm upset about it. Even though it's pretty much my fault. I'm so torn.

gettin lonely.

I am so lonely right now. The distance is getting more difficult everytime I see Colin. It's getting harder to see him drive away. I'm trying my hardest to not go there this weekend, since I'm going there next Thursday. We'll see if I can do it. Wish me luck. I need words of encouragement, cuz all I want to do is pack up & skip work & drive to see him, if only for an hour. I don't even care. :-(

I Love...

I want you to know...

I love everything about you.

I love your blue eyes.
I love that you wear your hat backwards.
I love that you put ketchup on everything.
I love when you quote goofy movies.
I love how you cheer me up.
I love your hugs.
I love your kisses.
I love that you let me wear your shirts.
I love that you gave me"Cuddles".
I love how you look when you're watching hockey.
I love when you say "you know it".
I love your laugh.
I love your family.
I love that my family loves you.
I love how you smell.
I love how warm you are.
I love the way you answer the phone.
I love that you like steak sandwiches.
I love when you talk about our future.
I love your truck.
I love it when you wash your truck.
I love your ears.
I love your hands.
I love holding your hands.
I love when you lay in bed with me.
I love it when you call me before bed.
I love your air guitar.
I love your smile.
I love how you look in pictures.
I love your hair.
I love how you look in jeans & a t-shirt.
I love how you look in nothing.
I love your birthmark.
I love that you know how to calm me down.
I love your name.
I love that you're ticklish.
I love that you appreciate me.
I love when you sing.
I love the way you look in the morning.
I love when you don't shave.
I love when you say you love me.
I love everything about you.

Crazy Little Thing Called Love

On Friday, I skipped 1/2 (hof, haha) a day of work to drive to visit Mr. Wonderful (who by the way, has a name haha...it's Colin). I got there, and had a fun Friday with him. I got to go for a ride in his truck. Which to some of you might seem lame, but I don't care...I liked it! I feel special that he wanted me to see his work truck. And wanted to take me for a ride in it. :-)

Saturday morning he got called out to work, then came back home & we went garage sale-ing with his mom. Saturday afternoon he got called out as well. So I spent the afternoon having a nap, and planting garden with his sister. Which I have to say is probably some of the most fun I've had in a long time. Reminds me of my home small town to plant a garden. I miss doing that.

And then on Sunday he got called out too. I was, of course, upset (yet again). Pathetic of me, I know. I should know better than to get upset at something that is going to make my dreams a reality someday. After he got home from work, we went to walmart & out for lunch. It was a nice drive to be able to go on with him. The alone time was nice.

So as horrible as I was feeling, I decided to let myself stay until this morning (5am came early) so I could spend 1 more night with him before returning to the stupid city. I worked all day(8:30-4:30), and ran errands after work(until 6), then came home. Only to realize how truely lonely I was. So I put on his shirt & some pj pants, grabbed the bear he bought me (don't laugh, but his name is "Cuddles"), and watched hockey. You know you miss someone when...

Yeah, I know, I'm such a sappy girl.

And on a final note...I saw THE house this weekend. CRAZY butterflies (or as Colin & I call it - PopRocks). It was the best scary feeling in the world. And now I wait...

trying to make sense of it all

I had a dream last nite. And all I remember are bits & pieces. This morning I wanted to know what it meant, so I looked it up. All I remember is the gas prices being too high. Next thing I remember I was crawling thru tents in the rain as green & red tree frogs fell from the sky & stuck to my arms & glasses.

Here's what I got:

Gas Price : symbolizes your need to take better care of yourself. You need to be revitalized.

Rain: soon be cleansed from troubles & problems. Symbolizes fertility & renewal.

Crawling: indicates that you are approaching your goals with careful forethought & preparation.

Tents: signifies of a refreshing, but temporary change in your daily routine. You need to get away from the daily grind.

Frog: potential to change or do the unexpected. Suggests that you are taking major steps toward some goal.

Red: raw energy, force, vigor, intense passion, courage. Deep emotional connotations. Sexual impulses & urges.

Green: positive change, growth, hope, vigor. Strive to gain recognition & establish independence.

And what the heck does all this mean, you ask? The only thing I can think of is my "white picket fence life" beginning...

Proves It...Again.

On Saturday, Mr. Wonderful made my weekend! He sent me a text saying that he was thinking about coming to visit me. 3 hours later, and once again proven that I have the greatest boyfriend in the world!

He met my parents...and dad gave me "the nod". YAY! And my brother proceeded to tell someone that he was his "brother-in-law". WHOA! Yes, I like hearing that, but slow down. Gimme ATLEAST 6 months.

I started my new training today for work. More hours, more money. Maybe then I can help with the white picket fence fund. I sure hope so.

PS-Did I mention that I'm IN LOVE! :-)

Emode Quiz Results

So I did a test at www.emode.com to find out "Is He Marriage Material?" because I was bored. This is what it told me:


"YES! You've hit the love jackpot! Not only have you found someone you're absolutely compatible with, but it looks like he feels the same way.

We can tell that your guy is committed, attentive, and definitely good to you. From the way he handles himself to the way he handles you, he's definitely marriage material.

So if you're spending a little more time checking out engagement rings at jewelry stores lately or have found yourself getting an almost uncontrollable urge to flip through wedding magazines, don't let it scare you. It's completely normal. Admit it, you've already started planning, right?

Chances are this guy is everything you've been looking for — don't let him slip away!"

Like I needed an online test to tell me that...

No Comparison

In one month I am more in love than I have been in my whole life.
Is that possible? Well it must be.
And I wish he would believe me that there is no comparison.

Too Unbelievably In Love...

Maybe I'm Amazed - Jem

Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You Love Me All The Time
Maybe I'm Afraid Of The Way I Love You
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You Pulled Me Out Of Time
And Hung Me On A Line
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way I Really Need You

Maybe I'm A Girl And Maybe I'm A Lonely Girl
Who's In The Middle Of Something
That She Doesn't Really Understand

Maybe I'm A Girl And Maybe You're The Only Man
Who Could Ever Help Me
Baby Won't You Help Me Understand

Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You're With Me All The Time
Maybe I'm Afraid Of The Way I Leave You
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You Help Me Sing My Song
Right Me When I'm Wrong
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way I Really Need You